I want a Man that wants me for me. All of me.

I want a Man that stands the test of time.

I want a Man that can communicate His needs, wants, desires, feelings, thoughts, and will do so with me, with no fear of me thinking less of Him for being human.

I want a Man that is kind, caring, and compassionate.

I want a man who can understand that I can, and will be the moon and stars to light any and all of His dark nights.

I want a Man that will lead, but is willing to have me by His side; helping Him with anything we may face.

I want a Man who challenges me to be better than I am, to go the distance.

I want a Man that appreciates my talents, gifts, abilities, and encourages me in them.

I want a Man that is able to be my Friend too.

I want a Man that is passionate about life and love, who shows by word and deed I am His woman, whom He is proud of.

I want a Man that will not let me get away with any of my bs, will understand what is in my heart and head; my why-fores (or at least Seek To understand). Who can jolt me out of apathy, and chide me out of a bad mood.

I want a Man that appreciates Nature, Books, Philosophy, and Spirituality.

I want a Man unafraid of hard work, and who is wise with finances.

I want a Man that understands that flaws have beauty too, and is not a perfectionist but wants to better Himself, who wants and helps me to do the same.

I want a Man that is Self-Aware.

I want a Man that has a good sense of humour, and can laugh at himself also.

I want a Man that likes to cuddle, hold hands, share a cuppa, and can enjoy companionable silences.

I want a Man that is a Gentlemen, and a Rogue behind closed doors.

I want a Man that knows what He wants and needs also. One whom will not settle anymore than I will for “less than” what we both deserve to have to be happy Together.

I want a Man that has Vision for the Future, has Dreams, and wants me to be a part of them all. Just as I will Him in mine.

These are listed as Wants. I also know myself well, and I know a lot of these are real needs too. I also do not expect perfection in anyone or anything. I believe that to do your personal best is enough.
I have had a long time to think on these things, and I know that I need a man that Guides me and wants me beside Him come what may. Many Alpha and Dominate males out there will not realise I have a submissive way in and about me, whilst I am a strong willed and minded capable woman. I have no choice but to be so.

A woman alone must be able to take care of herself and her loved ones. I’d hope any Man worth His “salt” would want a woman that can stand on her own, but choose to follow her Mate to hell and back willingly.

I am strong yet fragile. I am what, and who I am with no apologies.

Shine Dark,
Starra

“I ask a lot from others, because it is what I would be willing to give.” ~Unknown

“Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food” ― Hippocrates

My intentions are to go on a Raw Diet, eat as healthy as I can, drop weight and detox whilst doing so. Also, my hopes and intentions are to get my T2 Diabetes under control, with a strong possibility of reversing it.

I am in support of my loved ones, and for myself, seeking to be the healthiest Me I can be. I am not going to set in stone any goals. For now I just want to Feel Better.

So I am researching and studying a lot of free, reputable Information via the Internet. I also have quite a few friends who are either Vegans, know a great deal about Nutrition, Healthy Lifestyles, the connections of Mind, Body & Spirit, along with other things. I am fortunate to have them as willing “resources”.

So I have my Support Team in place. Now to get my “ducks in a row”. Or maybe I ought to say carrots in a row?

“Healing is a matter of time, but it is sometimes also a matter of opportunity.”
― Hippocrates

I did not get sick overnight, I did not gain the weight I carry now overnight either. Thus it will take time to regain my health, and to lose the weight I wish to lose.
I do not support crash or fad diets. I am not going to harm my already beleaguered body by doping something foolish.

I will not become a preachy type and I am not aiming at this time to be a vegan. If I get that way (preachy, not vegan) I expect a loved one to boot me in my sweet n’ sexy arse. ;)

Starting a Shopping List, Menus, and discussing these things with “The Kids” are in the works. I will be glad to buy fresh produce this weekend. I love veggies and fruit.They do too. I am not expecting them to eat as I do. They must decide for themselves what is best.

I admit that I hope they will make healthy choices, and eat less processed foods. The household budget does not allow for eating out. Once they are working they will of course do as they please. Adults that they are I have no say over these issues. But they do have to eat what Mom prepares. I do not play “Short Order Cook”. What is there is what we eat. So a lot more salads, a lot of fruit and cutting out sugar and processed foods for me.
I will be juicing soon too I hope. The “ex to be” has a friend that has a free juicer. Cool beans that! And a nice blessing from the Universe.

Later I will most likely combine the Raw diet with a Paleo diet.
Early in the game yet.

“A fit, healthy body—that is the best fashion statement”
― Jess C. Scott

I am not losing weight to be anything but healthy. My Man thinks I am sexy. I know I am sexy. I like me for the me I am inside, and my curvalicuious body may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but I am not looking for “everyone’s” approval. I have my own to love me As Is.

“You are imperfect, permanently and inevitably flawed. And you are beautiful.”  ― Amy Bloom

I intend to enjoy more energy, mobility, less stress and pain on my body over all with the weight loss. I am a curvy mature woman. I have stretch marks, scars, and cellulite. I do not expect to be like I was at 20. I am not 20 and I do not want to be. I like being who I am, I just want to be me healthier.

I hope to tighten up as I drop weight. I am fortunate in my compact 5ft frame having a lot of muscle and that I have always been muscular. Adding Yoga and certain Exercises to my Lifestyle Change will all be beneficial.

I just want to feel good, be healthier and fitter, and a bonus for me will be to wear a dress and know I look damned good in it.

Thanks For Listening.

Shine Dark,
Starra

I need to fly a bit. I need to step out on the edge. -Starra Neely Blade

Because I do Need to Fly a bit as it were, does not mean I need or want to be with anyone else. I am not interested in that at all in fact. One Man is all I ever want or need. I am a monogamous woman.

I do not seek or want to date or play the field. I am not that casual in things like this, nor about sex.

I do Know that I have to be true to myself in life. So I shall.

What I need Honestly is to Test My Wings, to fly a bit whilst discovering my Independent Self.  Discover the woman I am after my divorce, who I am in my own little place, who I am as I take care of my daughters, myself and as I am studying in college and working as the bread winner for the first time in my life.

Online College, setting up a non-traditional Career, Single Mom-dom.
Living “Alone” in a sense, as it will be Me as head of household, with no one to rely on, trust in, look to but Myself for the first time in my life.

I will be writing 2 books in my “spare time”. Working on my health & lifestyle changes with my daughters. I hope to get a bit more in touch with the community too.

~~~

I would In The Future like a committed relationship, but I am not sure what form that will or could take. I really am seeking to not think that far ahead. I do not consider this kind of thing lightly. I want to share love, laughter, life and any riough spots with someone else. Shouldering it With Him. Nurturing & Making Love, Playing and Learning Together.

Life, Love & its Adventures with Someone can be and should be Awesome. If they are not well then they are not The Right Person is all.

It really is Simple as That.

~~~

Even now I am seeking to realise my wholeness as a person. In not (truly) being someone’s wife. It is my fault I lost my Self in that. It did not have to be that way I see now.  And yes my soon to be “Ex” has his share too in the blame but I really seek to not become the stereotypical bitter divorcee’.

~~~

I realise these days that whilst I am quite fallible, emotional, a cracked pot (albeit a useful one) and I have my “issues”, I am a worthwhile woman who is usually loveable and I have a kind heart, strong will, good mind, and I am loyal to my loved ones & friends.

I am a Battle Maiden who is not a maiden, I defend & fight for the persons who need this quite naturally. Hence another good reason why I intend to become a Advocate.

So I love, I intend to live fully, I write and it is healing and helps me keep moving forward as I gather my many thoughts. I am learning not to over think and go more with the flow. Enjoy life as it is, in the present moment. To love each day and love others in my simple, passionate, and honest ways.

For Me, This is Enough For Now.

I have certain dreams & aspirations. But I have few needs. Simpler than most realise, easy to please, complex in my multifaceted always learning and seeking to know self too.

All I can state is this:

I am who and what I am.

And I ask only to be accepted for me and cared about/for as I am and as I become.

Shine Dark,

Starra

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“Keep your heart open to dreams. For as long as there’s a dream, there is hope, and as long as there is hope, there is joy in living.” - Anonymous